so today was a good day, i think :) first day of winterim was cool, i had fencing first and besides the fact that this annoying girl was flirting the instructor, it was good, even though we only worked of footwork. mainstream teaches you about race = okay. i also had teen reads and i picked up my first Jodi Picoult book; the pact. i'm really excited for it actually because of the storyline, but it's the only jodi picoult book i'd ever read. and then fantastic fractals which i'm excited for. so after school i had this dying urge for smoothie king and i told my friend amanda and she agreed. she can drive so i was like hmm wanna take me? even though my dad would be there to pick me up in half an hour. so she did and it was good :) it felt spontaneous which i liked, i wanna do more stuff like that, ya know?
Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets ; Arthur Miller
My day was good...until I had bowling practice. Because of fencing my thighs hurt and I think I might've pulled a muscle with all those lounges (where you have to jump and land in a lunge). Everything else throughout the day went pretty much normally and we had talk of Winter Formal :) can't wait for itt. So after school I had bowling practice. Everything was fine until the 3rd game of practice. Apparently our coach had to be somewhere by 5? So like.. everyone else was done except in my lane where there was three of us in our 6th frame. So he like comes over to take someone out because they're leaving and while he's at it he's like "Stori, I'm taking you out, nothing personal." I was like WHAT?! I was on a strike, it was PRACTICE, i could've caught up to my score. It just pissed me the fuuck off how he was just like "stori, you're off, nothing personal." Like I was laughing about it at first but it was really fuucked up of him.
i would've had the perfect opportunity to catch up to my score but noooo. he basically told me i sucked. and then when this other girl broke 100 which is kind of low for her anyways, he's just like "at least your score isn't as bad as stori's." he said it loud too i was like..... and i wouldn't talk to him for the rest of the ride. they probably think i'm over reacting and he tried to say he's sorry about what he said but i just walked away from him and was like i don't care, it doesn't even matter anymore. if he brought it up again i would've probably been like you obviously underestimate people wayy too much for your own good. cause he does it to other girls. and he talks about them behind their backs. god knows what he said about me after i left.
and then i got my grades today and i get what i always get but what pissed me off was my stupid english teacher. i'll vent about him another day when i have more room but basically we had to read this short story on our own before the exam and actively read. of course i did that and he comments on my report card and is like stori obviously was not prepared for her exam. she was assigned to read a short story and actively read to prepare but it obviously shows she didn't. i'm like W.T.F. you wouldn't biitchh you didn't check **** and he just pissed me the FUUCk off. ijrgnjrgnj not even going to stop because i won't stop. but i know he grades unfairly. i'm like 75 % sure he counted off right answers.
ughhhh i hate when adults are like that. they think they're so much better than us and can make us feel sh!tty just cuz they;re older :/ sorry you had a bad day :(
So I was reading Nicholas Sparks and I got really jealous of the love story. I was like is that even possible? But I guess some people can testify it is. We just have to sit back and wait, sadly. But I don't want to wait...
And now theres all this talk of Winter Formal and I want a date but I don't know if I can have one and stuff... I just don't know. And I find myself liking one of my friends? He's a great guy, I love hanging out with him we get along :) I think he's the guy who I was talking about a friends with benefits relationship with. But ehh, I just don't know. I hate not knowing things, it makes me feel useless =/.
We're in the same boat Starry. I feel like i'm always looking forward to the future, never happy with the present. And then when I read about such love it makes me feel like, well why not me?
we'll i already talked to you about this :) and take it from me, friends with benefits won't work the way you're thinking it will. and hang out with him more? and see if you can figure it out?
__________________
You're not quite there, you're not on my level. Trust me, for you I'm trouble.
"i'm miles from where you are, i'll lay down on the cold ground, and i'll pray that something picks me up and sets me down in your warm arms"
so i finished dear john... a bit depressing after watching the trailer too. i don't know it's put me in this mood tonight and i can't help but tear up every time i think about something like it. it's weird, it feels like for my entire life i'll searching for something but i don't know what and it's driving me crazy. i want to be content,
why can't i be content? i just want a happy ending...
uhmm so winterim is finished ): blah and my regular classes start tuesday since i have a student holiday monday. however in like two weeks is winter formal and i think im going. i was in a group with some friends and it was okay at first but then they got annoying but then i knew if i backed out after i like "put myself in the group" or whatever they would give me an attitude so i just made something up about having to go somewhere that weekend and now i'm joining my other friends group :) i'll just show up and be like i would have to go the next weekend.
but other than that things are chillax, turns out i'm a really good fencer and both of the instructors want me to compete in the beginner class because they think i can beat all so it makes me happy and i think i might do it :)
oh and my friend sarah's sweet 16 brunch is sunday so like four of my friends are coming over saturday night and having a movie marathon and sleep over. i'm excited since i haven't had that in a looong time and i really need something like it :)
so today, we had a snow day :) woot woot. which is so surprising because usually my school NEVER gets out for snow. but i guess chances of getting out are more for ice than snow and the roads are COVERED in ice, sadly. i wanted to go to school today because then i'd leave like second period to go to our state bowling tournament, and i was excited for that. but today means an extra day to do everything :) which makes me happy. like finally i hit the weekend and i dont have to worry about anything with my friends at school. it's just sit back and relax.